The Pseudo-Boyfriend

Some girls call him the "Uhm Friend." As one blogger chica puts it, the Uhm Friend is that guy in your life that when you're asked who he is, your quintessential answer is, "He's, uhm, a friend of mine."

I call him the Pseudo-Boyfriend.

The Pseudo-Boyfriend is that cute guy in your life you want to hang out with or go to parties with. Definitely, there is tension between the two of you but he is not your boyfriend. You really don't want him to be, but still, you are attracted to him.

He adds spice to your life. He gives you that "kilig" factor. You talk to him every now and then, updating each other on what goes on in your lives. You check out new hole-in-the-wall restaurants together, watch movies or go to Timezone to play Time Crisis 3.

He is a friend. With benefits.

However, he is not The Fuck Buddy. That's another creature altogether.

Sometimes you kiss. Or you makeout. But you do not sleep with him. Either there is no chance or you don't want to take that giant leap.

He gives comfort and that warm, flushed feeling that you are cared for. That there is someone there for you.

You talk. But you do not bare your entire soul to him. Neither does he.

He is not the friend who you can be truly friends with.

You seldom, or NEVER talk about the other romantic partners in your life. Or if you are both aware that you are both in a relationship, your partners rarely make it to the conversation. You shun away the topic.

I think, at one point in their lives, a lot of women can relate to this. We've all had pseudo-boyfriends, one way or another.


Does The Buddy fit?

The term Pseudo-Boyfriend isn't actually an original of mine. Miguel, a former officemate, once taunted me that The Buddy was acting like one. He actually calls him "my" Pseudo-Boyfriend.

We stayed on the phone until the wee hours of the morning. We gave each other wake-up calls. We went out to watch movies. He used to drive me home.

BUT:

We never kissed. Neither did we EVER make-out.

Well, there was one weird incident inside the moviehouse (I refuse to divulge more details. Suffice it to say that what happened was still for General Patronage.). That freaked us both out.

No, he's not my Pseudo-Boyfriend.

He's probably going to stay as The Buddy.

A perennial friend.

The "We-may-never-know-what-we-have-or-what-could-have-been friend."

Now I need to find a new term for this.