Pre-Hong Kong Notes

Only the first week of April, but it’s already my third time to go to Hong Kong.

Three times in a matter of four months.

Not bad at all.

Again, it’s not a secret. I LOVE Hong Kong.

I adore the place for its fashion sense, for the amalgam of people, for the weather.

For almost everything.

Hong Kong used to be my refuge – my escape town – when everything else is so stressful in Manila.

Hong Kong used to be my cradle of comfort when I need to have a quick getaway.

When I would go there, I would always say, “I’m coming home.”

But now, it doesn’t feel that way anymore.

My friends in Tung Chung are gone.

B. moved to Tin Shui Wai. Zoe has her own separate apartment now.

I, on the other hand, will live in a strange, unfamiliar place in Tsim Sha Tsui.

I will walk the streets of Granville Road by myself.

All of a sudden, I feel so estranged from the place that I used to call my second home.

I miss the disarray of the 2-bedroom flat in Tung Chung. The towering shoe boxes, the luggages of different sizes. I miss my couch potato moments when I flew to Hong Kong not to go around and shop, but to just be in front of the TV for the entire day.

I miss the times when B., Zoe and I were all in our pajamas the entire day --- taking turns hogging the couch, watching videos and surfing the Internet.

I miss smoking in the kitchen and staring at the Stitch magnetic stuffed toy stuck in the refrigerator with the rest of the ref magnets that B. and Zoe collected as they traveled across the globe.

Now, I don’t have a home to go back to.

I am by myself.

And instead of coming home, it feels like I am going inside the lion’s den.

I am a lamb that will be fed to the lions.

And nobody else is there for me.

I guess, that's what I am now.


Homeless in Hong Kong.


What did Angelina Jolie say?


"I stand by the choices I made."


No matter the consequences.