Angry

...is what I am.

I'm angry at you.

For making me feel I have no options.

Because you took them away from me.

Fame!

Remember my name
Fame

I'm gonna live forever
I'm gonna learn how to fly
High

I feel it coming together
People will see me and cry
Fame

I'm gonna make it to heaven
Light up the sky like a flame
Fame

I'm gonna live forever
Baby remember my name

You better.

Of Pinoys, striving for excellence and pwede na mentality

With last week's hostage drama that shook the Philippines, I am re-posting Erwin Oliva's article on Yahoo's FTP.

Among everything that was written about the hostage drama and the recent Miss Universe pageant, I'm quite affected by this article.

As a Pinoy who graduated from UP, it was instilled in our minds to always strive for the best. In my entire stint at the state university during my undergrad and graduate studies, it was drilled in our heads that coming from the bastion of freedom and academic excellence, it was natural for us to be the best that we can, to loathe mediocrity, to never settle.

Even before my university days, I was raised by my Mom to over-achieve. A little bit of slant in my penmanship and my notebooks flew out of our house's window. Second best was never an option.

I feel strongly about being pwede na. I was never pwede na. I've always pushed myself to the limits and I've seen many of my batchmates, my colleagues and my friends do the same thing.

Yes - we are all Pinoys. My core friends are Pinoys. No matter how many expat friends I have, no matter how many countries I go to and live in, I am Pinoy. To the core. No matter what.

And no --- I don't subscribe to pwede na mentality. Never did, never will.


Why there's hope and the 'pwede na' mentality

by Erwin Oliva

I’m writing this opinion piece as a direct reaction to a Huffington Post article on the recent hostage crisis and Venus Raj’s supposed blunder in the concluded Miss Universe pageant. One question was posed, as this article ended: How much are Filipinos demanding of themselves?

Mr. Wagner wrote: “I came to the conclusion that in spite of all the things the Philippines has going for it, its people didn’t demand enough of themselves, or of their government. Political apathy and a willingness to accept a low common denominator of performance have taken their toll on the psyche of the Philippine people.”

I’m teaching now at the University of the Philippines. Apart from imparting lesson on how to write for a popular audience, I’m sharing values and life’s lessons. Every writing exercise also aims to build confidence. From these exercises, I’m hoping to drill the point that they should strive for excellence.

Once I was asked why I decided to teach. My reply: I see hope in these kids. That may sound corny, but it’s true. There’s nothing more satisfying than knowing that after weeks of sharing lessons in writing, they will also realize I’m future-proofing them. I learned this lesson the hard way.

I made mistakes—but there was none that I would have regretted. So this would explain Venus’ “major, major” answer that has been turned into a running joke. At such a young age, Venus sees hope. So when asked what was the biggest mistake she has done in her life, and what could have she done to correct it, she didn’t pick a specific incident. We all make mistakes in life and we learn from it. No regrets. In my book, that’s an honest answer to a very difficult question.

Reacting to a post I made on Facebook about the HuffPost article, Filipino journalist Luz Rimban thinks that “even when success should be within reach, we often don’t ensure it, or don’t set ourselves up to succeed. It’s not just the ‘pwede na’ [That’s good enough] mentality. It’s the lack of competitiveness, the absence of the fight-to-the-finish, all-or-nothing mentality that drives others to be the best they can be. Filipinos just make do. But the situation is different when Filipinos go abroad, however. Nag-iiba na mindset nila [Their mindset changes].”

On August 23, 2010, the world watched a desperate former policeman take hostage of innocent tourists in Manila. As I watched events unfold, I felt sadness and anger. For a country wanting hope, this is another black-eye. The day-long hostage drama ended in a bloodbath. The next day, Venus who was touted as one of the top Ms. Universe candidates supposedly choked when asked a difficult question. Somehow, some local and foreign observers connected this event to the August 23 hostage fiasco.

Is this a reflection of the Philippine society? Do Filipinos love shooting themselves on the foot? Mistakes are repeated, giving out the impression that we don’t learn from history? Sad, but it’s true.

Jojo Ayson, another Filipino who reacted to my question on Facebook, offered this opinion: “As a general rule of thumb, we should all demand more from ourselves and strive to be better. I agree that we have to demand more from ourselves in the situation and not continue with a ‘pwede na’ attitude. Even if things did go better there is always room for improvement. That said, regardless of where you stand on the level of competency displayed I think we can all agree that we could have done better. The key is in striving to be better. If we had that attitude then we will no longer fall victim of ‘pwede na.’”

Indeed, Filipinos do demand from themselves a lot. Our pursuit of excellence is reflected in our sheer determination to survive the onslaught of negative forces shaping society. I saw this during Ondoy where unsung heroes thrived. The country witnessed this when the people toppled a dictatorship in 1986. I was there when Filipinos decided to boot out Estrada from government.

And who can deny that Manny Pacquiao is one shining example of the Filipinos’ pursuit of excellence. He epitomizes the Filipinos’ struggle to become the greatest in what they do.

In a recent lunch conversation with a friend who read a draft of this piece, she offered this insight: our pursuit of excellence is relative to our situation. For most Filipinos living in poverty, finding a decent job to pay for a decent meal drives them to demand more from themselves.

Overseas Filipino workers decide to leave their families to work abroad –sometimes in harsh conditions – to provide them a better future.

One would argue that the abovementioned examples are natural reactions to situations where government has failed to provide jobs for its booming population.

The Filipinos’ psyche is indeed intriguing, as Mr. Wagner pointed out in his article.

“If the Philippines wants to get its act together and live up to its potential, it needs to demand more of itself. It can achieve this by stopping making excuses for its failures and ending its acceptance of the lowest common denominator,” Mr Wagner posed.

If you look at Philippine history, we Filipinos have risen to the occasion many times over to topple a dictatorship, to boot out corrupt government officials, and correct a misdirected government. In short, we’re still hoping to change for the better, and if it takes a lifetime to achieve that, then so be it.

I don’t expect changes to happen overnight, as world histories have taught me. But it is clear from our vantage as Filipinos that hope is not so far off. Not everyone accepts the lowest common denominator, and we’re not going to make any excuses for our law enforcers’ or even media’s failures.