How to come around

If you ask me, I'd like things to be a bit simpler than they are now.

If I'd like to go back?

Most definitely.

I want comfortable, honest mornings. I want the smell of coffee while I shower and get ready for work.

I want her to be there - just lazily lying on my bed as she watches me select and unselect an office outfit - tossing shirts and pants here and there.

But why is it just so difficult to come around?

I am not a brooding person. I don't like bearing grudges against anyone. It's bad vibes. Too negative.

But there were things said that hurt me. They pierced through me.

There were words and accusations hurled that made me question myself.

Whenever I think about things said and done --- it still hurts. I still feel crushed.

Sometimes, I wonder - can someone who really fell in love with me hurt me through words?

If someone knows the formula on how to easily come around, then do let me know.

I wish I can go back. I really wish I could.