Preyssure, preyssure!

Last Saturday, Jovan, Emer, Romy and I went to EJ’s wedding.

Clad in formal outfits, we looked like teenyboppers going to a prom night.

We were late – since Jovan had to occasionally stop over in gasoline stations or shoulders to wait for Romy who was still being OC about his new car. Thus, the turtle-paced voyage to Tagaytay.

Nevertheless, we were just in time to hear Carlo and EJ’s exchange of vows.

During the “I dos,” I hurriedly attached my headset to my mobile to call The Boyfriend and tell him what was happening.

I was overwhelmed for both the newly-weds.

With Jovan sitting beside me, we were in awe of what’s happening, with the realization sinking in that we are definitely in the marrying age already.

We were so giddy discussing wedding details as Jovan and I both agreed that our relatives would definitely ruin the occasion for us, with rifts and clan issues. We were animatedly bantering about nice wedding themes, songs and colors.

At the end of it all, however, we both agreed that it hasn’t totally sunk in. The bottomline: WE ARE NOT READY.

I fended off engagement proposals more than three times last year. The thought of engagement and proposal makes me feel claustrophobic. Whenever I am asked when the big thing is for me, I feel a ton of steel pounding on my chest. Not to mention that manic upheaval I felt when I read Emer’s recent blog entry!

The truth is, it’s not a big thing for me. Well, I don’t feel it is. Not just yet.

I was never the little girl who would fantasize walking along the aisle, wearing a white gown and a veil, with a Ken waiting for me at the altar.

Baj was saying that I don’t have “bride genes.” That’s the first time I heard of such a thing.

This year, I will be attending more than 3 weddings of friends. I bet I would encounter the “when” question again.

Tick-tock-tick-tock, says Emer. Time is running out for me. I know The Boyfriend would pop the question anytime soon. I don’t think I could hold it off any longer.

If I have to say no, I would. I think if I want to get married already I would know when, I would feel it.

I am waiting for that feeling.

I am sure it will come to me, but right now I am too preoccupied in thinking of how I would rule the world – and the universe, eventually.

Or maybe, just maybe, when he pops the question, that overwhelming feeling will come to me, swoon me over and make me say YES.

Oh well – I’d rather plan on taking over the world tonight than dwell too much on that again.